I don’t know why I let this upset me so much, but one of my sisters and I got into it yesterday over potential gifts/baby showers. My sister asked me if mom was going to get her this $150 breast pump that she wanted so she could “try” and breast feed. I said, I am not sure she was thrilled with the price, maybe you should talk to her about it. She immediately flipped out cause she knew my mom was going to get me a crib and that it was more than likely going to be over $150. She wasn’t happy that my mom was going to purchase me something expensive and would not do the same for her. I immediately said that it’s my first kid and mom has gotten you stuff over the years for your other 2. This will be her third. Only difference is, this one’s a boy, so she needs all new things according to her. But what I don’t like is that she kind of expects people to cater to her or get her what she wants. I told her she was lucky she’s even getting a third baby shower, cause people shouldn’t get one after the first baby. That really pissed her off cause she assumes that all babies should be created equal whether its the first or third. I was never insinuating that a second or third baby is less special than the next, but to me, baby showers are to help out new parents who are just starting their journey of parenthood, not a buy me everything I need for every kid I pop out party. Yes, she’s family and I don’t mind helping her out since she’s helped me out with stuff from her girls. Hell, I am the one who has put together a shower for her so obviously I care enough to do it.
Her mindset is not right though. She had a shower thrown for her down in Newport where she lives and was disappointed in the amount of people that showed up and said she didn’t get that much stuff. She even mentioned to me how my husband’s family is big and that we’re going to get spoiled and how she won’t get as many things as us. Honestly, I’d rather not have them throw us a shower because we already have too much as it is but my husband insists since it may be his mothers last grand child since he’s the youngest and no one else is having anymore kids besides him. Who knows, there may just be 1 more.
The other thing that irritates me is that my family wanted me to have a combined baby shower with her. My friend didn’t like that idea so she said she would throw me one since I am deserving of my own as this is my first child. My husband didn’t like that idea either, I was almost fine with it but now I see their point. I shouldn’t have to share my day with someone else who’s already had their moment. BTW, if my husband and I have anymore kids, I don’t plan on having anymore showers, regardless if its a boy or not. We’ve pretty much bought all that we need for this one anyways, wouldn’t be any different for a new child.
Another thing is, my sister, or anyone in my family really would not go through the effort to throw me a shower like I do for them. It’s pretty sad really.
And what most people don’t realize is that when you have a kid, its your responsibility to buy what you need for your child, after all, you’re the one who decided to get pregnant. Don’t expect or have this entitlement behavior that people should get what you think you need. Whatever gifts you may receive are just an added bonus.
Thoughts? Do you agree or disagree?