And Here I Thought Breastfeeding Was Going to Be Easy

What’s funny is that my husband kind of warned me about breastfeeding. Told me he needed to get my nipples prepared for what’s about to come, only because he dealt with it for a little while with his ex-wife but she gave up right away.

I didn’t even fathom the amount of pain, emotions, and frustration I would be going through once my little one arrived. I knew I wanted to breastfeed but didn’t think it would be this hard.

From the time she came out, she was ready to suckle on the breast. It’s kind of amazing how they know exactly what to do upon birth. The nurses were helping me with correct latching, but I never really got it down on my own while I was there in the hospital for 2 days. I needed a lactation specialist to come chat and show me what to do, which still wasn’t going well the first 4 days at home.

My milk had come in on the 3rd day in the evening which left my breasts hard and sore, my nipples were cracking, blistering and it made getting my little one to latch correctly difficult. She basically could only take the nipple even with me squeezing the end into a c shape like the doctor told me, so I finally said screw it and just let her have the nipple which only made things worse for me and I assume worse for her too.

And before my milk came in, I was an emotional wreck. She was acting lethargic, turning yellow which means jaundiced (she didn’t have it at the hospital) and I couldn’t get her to eat without falling asleep. She wasn’t getting hardly anything from me on day 1, 2 and 3. I finally told my husband that I couldn’t do this and sit there and watch her pretty much starve, so we supplemented with formula and she started acting normal again. I know most people say that this is not good when you want to breastfeed but it was what was best for us. In order to get jaundice out while my milk started to come in, we needed to supplement to get her to poop. She hadn’t pooped but once when we got home the first day and barely peed which means she was dehydrated. It was painful to watch that so please don’t judge.

It’s been 2 weeks now for breastfeeding and although I am getting the latch down somewhat, it’s still painful, only I don’t have the blisters or the cracking anymore because I’ve been religiously putting medela lanolin on them. On really sore days, I try to pump more to give them a break from intense suckling. I’ve read enough on breastfeeding to know that the pump is not going to get anywhere near the amount of milk I can produce out, but again, it’s what is working for me at this time. I just hope it begins to get better.

I honestly believe this is far worse than labor and birth.

Today I got about 2 ounces from both breasts which is the most I have gotten so far in these 2 weeks. She’s eating 2-3oz per feeding, so I hope I can continue to produce what she can eat. She’s been a miss piggy lately, but apparently, this is normal.

Wish me luck…

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